No Minivan

I am so obsessed with my fish. Probably because work is infinitely tedious right now. And there he is happily swimming around in his little tank. Giving me minutes of entertainment before I focus back on more and more data entry.

I haven’t moved the betta over to the new 2 gallon tank yet. I’m letting it run for a few days before I toss him in. I was worried that it might get too cold (Bettas are tropical fish, you know) so I bought a heater for it, but the thermometer I also picked up has read a steady 79 degrees all morning. I think it’s the air vent on my laptop heating it up. I also considered getting a filter, but the tank comes with one (sort of) and the girls at Petco talked me out of it. And no piddly fish flakes for my boy, he only eats freeze-dried bloodworms. Mmm mmm good!

Yes, I know I’m spoiling him.

The snail is annoying me. When I had him at home, he was very active and crawling all over the tank. Since I brought it to work, he’s hardly moved. I don’t know if the betta has been annoying him, if the water conditions are bad for him, or if all the moving around freaked him out, but he’s been hibernating for about a week now. If he’s moving around at night, I can’t tell. He’s not dead, according to Dr. Google, because he’s still in his shell with his “trapdoor” closed and he doesn’t smell bad. But he is an incredibly boring pet and an ineffective algae eater, if he just stays in his shell all the time. I moved him over to the new tank today, so he’ll be in there for about 24 hours by himself. If the betta was bugging him (which I never saw him do), maybe this will give him an opportunity to explore before the betta joins him. I’m also thinking about adding one or two other snails to hang out with him.

Isn’t this just the most exciting post EVER?!! Well, half the women I know are pregnant right now, and since I won’t be joining them any time soon (or ever again), I have to get my “new thing to take care of” fix somewhere.

I bought a USB powered fish tank for work. It doesn’t filter, but it aerates and heats the water a little bit so the fish won’t freeze over the weekend. The kid helped me pick out a gorgeous male Betta (Siamese Fighting Fish). He’s primarily turquoise with a little bit of red, and apparently his fin style is “crowntail” (very long and feathery – kind of like this one). I also got a small Golden/Mystery/Apple snail to help keep the tank clean. He’s a cute little thing. And he doesn’t appear to be popping out any babies, so I think my teeny tiny tank is safe from snail overpopulation. It’s nice to have a pet at work. It’s very relaxing watching them swim/crawl around the tank.

Sooooo, the whole weight loss thing… um, yeah… That’s not going so well. I pretty much gave up once I started traveling for work about a month and a half ago. It’s pretty hard to say no when the company you’re visiting is offering free meals (and entire pints of gourmet ice cream)that are not diet friendly. I promised myself I’d get back on track this week, but I haven’t been 100% faithful to the diet and I haven’t exercised at all (other than walking down to see the fireworks on Saturday). I’m not mentally in the game right now and I need to be.

It doesn’t help that I am absolutely addicted to the Mcdonalds Caramel Frappe and have a buttload of coupons for a free small. There is not much I like to eat at Mcdonalds (aside from their tasty fries!), but those frappes are some good stuff.

Today we met with the Kid’s principle and the teacher who ran the testing a few weeks ago. Basically, the Kid is off the charts in overall “communication arts”. His reading level is an 18. I have no idea what that means, but the next highest score (IN THE ENTIRE K CLASS) is an 11. According to the test, his reading and comprehension put him in the 2nd grade. We tend to think it’s actually higher, but part of the test included writing answers to comprehension questions and the Kid hates to write (more on that later). His math skills are at about the level a 1st grader would be at mid-school year, so he’s a little advanced there as well. Much of what he missed on the math portion are things he’s just never been exposed to. Some of the stuff *I* had never been exposed to (What’s up with doing math problems in a triangle?).

The subject he’s definitely at or below level in is writing. He writes in all capitol letters with no spaces between words and no punctuation. When asked to write a descriptive story about a special event in his life, with pages and pages to write on, he basically wrote “MYCLASSWENTTOTHEMAGICHOUSE”. So writing is definitely an area he needs more work in. But he couldn’t write at all before Kindergarten so we’re on the right track. He’s just one of those kids who expects things to master things easily and when it doesn’t, he either gets overly emotional or just shuts down. We’ve got to work on that.

In the end, we decided that he should go to 1st grade next year, with enriching activities in reading and math. Luckily, the teacher who tested him will be his teacher next year. She had a really good rapport with the Kid and seems to be on top of her game. She said it would be no problem to give him more advanced work and had worked with kids with his talent previously. I let her know that I’m not trying to be the helicopter parent from Hell, I just want my kid to not hate school and to be challenged in his work. I made sure to let the principal know how disappointed and upset I am with his Kindergarten teacher. She promised us enriching activities too and it never happened. She continued to teach to the lowest common denominator. I was also upset by her demeaner towards my son. The Kid came hom on more than one occasion saying that she had called him a “bad kid” and then the other kids started calling him bad. I know my kid isn’t the most well behaved child, but he is NOT a bad kid.

So we’ll see how it goes next year. The prinicipal is awesome and very open to reconsidering the plan if it’s not working out. If the 1st grade teacher can’t provide what he needs, they could pull him up to 2nd grade just for the reading activities. Or re-assess bumping him up a grade. I just hope next year is better for my boy. Of course I want my kids to only have the best of everything!

Sorry my first post back was so incredibly bitchy. The funk has decended this week and I can’t seem to shake it. Hopefully, it will pass soon.

In other news, did I mention I just got back from the motherfrakking Netherlands?!?! How cool is that? I stayed in a great litle village just a few miles from the sea and took a gorgeous bike ride to the beach one night. I was there for work, but I made sure to make time for fun this time since I was there for a week. On Friday night, I stayed at a hotel near Schiphol Airport and explored Amsterdam Centraal. For those up on your voetbal, you already know that was the night that Holland won against Brazil. Needless to say, there was great merryment in the streets. I’ll post some pictures and video soon.

During my mad travels over the last 3 weeks, I also made a stop in Raleigh, NC and picked up my very first designer handbag (yes, you heard that right: handbag. Not purse. Don’t be hatin’.). I was so impressed with Marty’s story of the stolen bag and the designer’s willingness to replace it for her, free of charge (who does that?!). Plus, the bags are so cute and damn near indestructable, I had to get one of my very own. Unfortunately, the bag I bought is too small for the great wealth of crap I carry around from day to day. Lucky for me, the very awesome Holly Aiken agreed to let me exchange my bag for a larger version when I return to Raleigh later this month since I haven’t used it!

Another exciting (to me) purchase was my new brown work shoes. My old ones were falling apart and I was having a terrible time finding a new pair that was comfortable and looked decent with a pair of khaki dress pants. These little gems fit the bill, with the caveat that I have to put band aids over the bone under my big toe otherwise they rub very painfully on that spot.

In kid news, the Kid smacked his little brother in the mouth with the metal gate that’s between the kitchen and the living room and chipped his front tooth. Luckily they both already had an appointment witht he dentist that week. Boo’s tooth is OK and the dentist filed off the sharp edge, but he’s going to have a chipped smile until his baby teeth fall out in a few years. The Kid has had a bad run of doing things that end up with his briother crying lately. I think now that Boo is getting a little older/bigger, he forgets that he still outweighs him by 50 pounds. I’ve got an older kid off the charts in weight/height and a younger kid below the 30th percentile. Add that to the fact that they’re 4 years apart and you can see that it’s a dangerous combination when they play rough (as boys are wont to do).

We have an appointment with the Kid’s principal and one of the teachers tomorrow. We had the school administer some additional tests to see if he could be accelerated to 2nd grade next year. Really, I’m not sold on him skipping grades (even though socially he does do better with older kids), I just want the school to formally recognize his “smarts” and teach him accordingly. It was ridiculous that a kid who reads on a 4th grade level (according to the school) be teached the basics of the alphabet and letter sounds for an entire school year. I want him taught on his level and to be challenged (more than just once a week in the gifted program), whether that’s in 1st or 2nd grade.

I’ve got a few other things I want to talk about, but I’ll save that for another post!

Sometimes people just really piss me off.

I don’t know if it was the dose of Lex.a.pro I missed or the fact that I’m on the rag or that I was recovery from jet lag (just returned from the Netherlands) or a combination of all of the above, but I have been cranky as all get out for the last few days. And the one thing that was really eating at me was that it looked like my husband had not planned anything for our wedding anniversary (Before you jump on your high horse, I plan everything else in our lives. And I mean EVERYTHING. It’s not unreasonable that I expect him to plan our anniversary and Valentine’s Day dates). It was last week (June 30th) and since I was out of town, we just exchanged emails to commemorate the day. I thought I would come home to dinner plans or at least a card. I had picked up a very romantic card at the Hallmark in the airport and had written a near paragraph of sweet nothings in it.

I came home to nothing. No card, no plans for dinner*, nothing. So obviously I was a little disappointed. The longer the weekend went on, the more disheartened I felt. Finally I posted a comment on Facebook, hoping for a little support for my girls. One of the moms from Hubby’s playgroup posts “”Aww, cut him a break. As the wife of someone who travels, it is exhausting being a part time single parent.”

To that, I say “FUCK YOU.” First of all, how lazy is she, that she’s too exhausted to pick up a card?!?. Secondly and most importantly, my husband knows exactly how much I appreciate him and what he does for our family (in fact, I wrote just that in his anniversary card!). And as someone on the other side of the fence, let me tell you just how stressful it is to be the sole breadwinner for a family of four. Let’s talk about how “exhausted” you’d be if your spouse lost his job and you had to be the one working 40+ hours for the financial support of your family, knowing that if you lost your job your family would be without food, clothing and electricity (or feeling completely ashamed to you ask your family/friends for financial help). And we all know it’s nice to get a break from the family now and then, but let’s consider the ‘joy’ of traveling away from your kids for 3 weeks straight, only coming home long enough to give your spouse a break before you hop on another plane, or spend 11 hours in an airport, sleeping on the floor (in a puddle no less), because another flight was canceled.

Instead of taking my kids to playgroup, I spend my days in front of a computer in a cubicle. Instead of tucking my kids in at night for the last 3 weeks, I could only talk to them online or on the phone. I don’t deny that being a full time parent is stressful, exhausting and sometimes downright irritating, but don’t think that a working spouse’s job isn’t just as stressful, exhausting and downright irritating. And definitely do not imply that I don’t appreciate what my husband does. I have the utmost respect for stay at home parents and I also know that I would take on that exhausting job in a heartbeat.

*Turns out there were plan for a dinner date next weekend, he just didn’t tell me until I complained. Apparently, in addition to making dental appoinments, teacher appointments and renewing the Zoo membership while I’m traveling around the world, I’m also supposed to be psychic.

X-posted from FB….

For those who want to better understand what’s going on with my health issues, here’s the Cliff Notes version:

~4 years ago, when I was going through infertility treatment, my fertility specialist sent me to a GI doctor because my AST and ALT (liver) tests were a little abnormal. The GI doc ran some more tests and determined I had a fatty liver (to go with my fatty ass). He pretty much just told me to go on a diet and that was that.

Fast forward to this year and I’ve been having stomach issues off and on for about 3 months. GERD-related pains in my stomach and a weird piercing pain on the right side of my chest. Plus, frequent diarrhea and occasional vomiting. So off to a GI specialist I go again. This doc also says I have fatty liver, but he’s not sure how/if it has progressed.

Basically the liver cells store more and more fat until they explode and die. If it gets bad enough that the liver cells start dying off at a faster rate than new cells are developing, that becomes fatty hepatitis. Build up enough scar tissue from the dead cells and that becomes cirrhosis. Fatty liver and fatty hepatitis are reversible; the only cure for cirrhosis is a new liver. So you can see why it’s important to know how far along the damage is and how my liver is functioning. Hence, the liver biopsy a week ago. Results of the liver biopsy: Basically, I have about 3 years to lose all my excess weight or I’ll likely need a liver transplant. In fact, the word the doc used was “skinny” (HA!). 12 pounds down, only 100+ to go!

It’s also hard to pinpoint what is causing my stomach issues. Could be the GERD, could be an ulcer, could be my gallbladder or something else. He won’t know until he looks inside. And since I have a family history of pre-cancerous polyps in the colon, he wants to take a look at both ends just to be sure there’s no problems. Hence, the colonoscopy and endoscopy yesterday. All is well on both ends (ha!). I had a polyp removed that they’re sending for testing just in case. A little too much bile in my system (ha!) so the doc is giving me more meds.

So that’s my story so far, kids. I’ll keep you posted.

• Look at me! I'm all twittering and stuff! And hello to the lovely ladies I met at the Recharge event! #recharge #

Hi! Remember me? No? Yeah, me neither. But for those who still read this site now and again, here’s what’s been on my mind lately:

- Been thinking about going public with this site. Well, it’s not private by any means, but there is a certain amount of anonymity from many of my friends, family and coworkers. I think I might write more if I knew people were reading and more people who knew me were reading, not random strangers. A lot of the bloggers I’ve friended on Facebook share links to their new posts there and I often wish I could do that. I don’t really talk about anything ultra confidential and I definitely don’t talk about work since the fiasco at my last job, so there wouldn’t be any harm in sharing my current posts (on the rare occasion I write one) with the folks who know me. However, there are archived posts where I vent about my family and friends that I’m not sure I want them to read. I wish I could password protect part of my archive without having to go post by post. I’ve been writing since 2002. That’s a lot of posts. Still, it’s something to consider.

- I think I may be perimenopausal. I’m only 33, but I’m really starting to wonder. For the last week or two, I’ve been having hot flashes, really bad acne and terrible mood swings. Clearly, my hormones are f***ed up (and I’m NOT pregnant). So I made an appointment with my OBGYN in 2 weeks to find out what is going on with my body. My prediction is he’s going to want to put me back on the pill. The last pill pretty much negated the lovely effects of the Lex.apro so it will have to be something else. I can’t afford for the anxiety to get worse right now, especially since…

- Work is crazy busy! We’ve reorganized and I’m taking on a completely different role. However, I’m still doing a lot of my old job too, which means I’m twice as busy as before. It’s making me feel VERY anxious and irritable. It’s not hard work, but it’s very time consuming and there’s A LOT of it. Plus, all of my coworkers are being stretched to the limit, too, so we’re all anxious and freaking out a bit. It also doesn’t help that our boss is a bit of a control freak (something I’ve told him to his face so no worries if I go public with the blog).

- My cell phone contract is up in 2 weeks and I’m debating if I want to get a better phone and keep my current plan, get a better phone for my hubby under my current plan, or get a pay as you go phone and plan. I never call anyone and I get very few calls either (for an extrovert, I’m very introverted) so it doesn’t make sense to pay for 500 minutes a month that I never even come close to using. However, I would like to be able to access Facebook and check my email on my phone, which I can’t do now. Do you have a NON-smartphone that does that?

Isn’t my life just a thrill a minute?